I was alone, in my bedroom, staring at the window, listening to some music. Nothing else. And thinking. Thinking about you, about me, about my mistakes, about everything I should have done, but I didn't. Maybe I'm just stupid, or perhaps I'm not stupid at all! I don't know what to think anymore. Everyone says that love's great. I say love is nothing more than bullshit. And why is that? Well, maybe is because I'm actually stupid. Or maybe is because nobody ever loved me back. Feels more like it! I spent all my life believing in lies, loving people who didn't care about me... at all! Why? Why does it always happens to me? Maybe I deserve it... Maybe not! I don't think I deserve it... Other people may think it. I don't. Anyway... What other people think doesn't matter at all... I still don't have that love. That feeling that everyone says is amazing. To me, love means suffering. Love means lies. Love means anger. Especially when my best friend loves the same guy I love. And that guy actually has a girlfriend. So, tell me... Why do we keep suffering because of him? Why don't we just forget about him and move on? We just can't... Don't ask me why... I tried, I swear. But I can't, and neither does she. These were my thoughts that day. But, suddenly, they stopped. A Megadeth song started to play on my computer. "The hardest part of letting go... Sealed with a kiss". I knew I couldn't listen to it without crying, but I didn't stopped the song. I felt something inside of me. Something really weird... I was unable to move. I had to listen to it. You should listen... Anyway... I stand there, listening to it, crying, looking at the window, watching the birds flying... And my thoughts came back. But this time they were different... This time I wanted to kiss him, see his reaction and then I wouldn't know what to do... But I didn't care. I needed to feel his lips touching mine... Gently and passionately. But something stopped my thoughts... again... Someone knocked on the door. I opened it. I was wearing an huge t-shirt, old socks and nothing else. I was still crying. I got up, went to the door, and opened it. I froze. It was him at the door! He hugged me. I let him in. We are alone, at my house. We went to my bedroom. He kissed me and grabbed me so hard that I couldn't resist. I hugged him. He pushed me to my bed. He lied down on me and started kissing me again. I was in heaven! Suddenly, he took of his belt. I started to feel scared, but I couldn't stop! A little later, he took of his pants. He wasn't wearing anything under that hot pants... I froze again. But then he kissed me, and he took of my t-shirt so gently that I felt actually loved! I couldn't wait anymore! I took of his shirt. That was it. We were naked, alone, in my house, in my bedroom, in my bed. He looked at me for a few seconds and then he kissed me again. Then I said "I'm ready". He said "Are you sure? Do you really wanna do this?" I answered "More that everything!" He didn't wait not even a second. He penetrated me. It hurted at the beggining, but soon started to feel good. We started kissing again. I wasn't believing that was real! But it was too good to be just another dream. I knew that time it was real. I was having the best time of my life. We had sex for half an hour, but we were together more than 5 hours. Just listening to some music and talking. It felt soo good! When I looked at the watch were already 6 o'clock in the morning! It was time for him to go. It was so much time, but it felt like 10 minutes. I was sure... I wanted him forever! I needed him forever! The next day I talked to him. He said he loved me! I was so happy! He ended up everything with his stupid girlfriend. But there was a problem left... My bestfriend was in love with him too... So, I decided to talk to her and I told her what happened. She understood, and she said "I just want you to be happy, and our friendship is more important than a silly boy... Are you happy with him? Good, then I'll be fine." In the bottom she wasn't ok, but with the time, she got used to it. That was when I understood why people always say that love is great! Is more than that! Is the best feeling in the world, when that special person loves you back.
P.S. This story IS NOT real!